I don’t think there is any manual or a “how to” book that can teach us how to be a perfect mother. I believe I am learning daily and this will be a learning process for my lifetime. Becoming a parent teaches us to live in the moment. Our focus in life becomes our children, what we teach them, feed them, buy for them etc is an important and crucial household affair. Motherhood also teaches us a whole lot about ourselves; it might even shape us into the person we become.
It has just been 2 months and few weeks since I had “Vir”, and I have already discovered some my new traits and strengths, that I never knew existed.
- There is a “No sleep” function mode we operate on – I am amazed how mothers function with such less sleep. You don’t get a break with an infant. Wake up every 2 hours in the night to feed, change the diapers , sing them back to sleep; and by the time you are able to get back in deep sleep, the kiddo is up again. No wonder I am waking up with dark circles and baggy eyes in the morning, with a slight headache and lethargy, looking like a mama zombie or as I like to call it a “Mombie”. (A sleep deprived supermom who feeds on caffeine and survives on sticky kisses and messy smiles) Internet is full of articles telling us to catch short naps while the baby is asleep. Easier said than done, especially if you’re not a nap person.
- You are now a MOM – Master of Multitasking – I was always proud of my multi-tasking skills, be it at work or at home. But now being a full-time work-from-home mom, with a 2 month breast-feeding baby and a furry terrier competing for my attention, I am able to simultaneously perform endless tasks and chores. I was an amateur multi-tasker before; motherhood has helped me master it and yes I already feel like a Supermom!
- No matter how strong we think we are, we can also cry like a baby – Some of us are strong, we can hold back our tears. I thought I was strong, until I saw tears in my baby’s eyes. Babies don’t have tears in their eyes until few weeks. But when I first saw his tears it broke my heart, and then when he got his first shots, I think I cried more than him. Now I understand why my mom can’t handle my tears.
- Appreciating your genes – With every passing day our babies start resembling one of the parents. “Vir” looks more like me. Yeahh !! His smile, eyes, long fingers and his full head of hair have suddenly led me to appreciate my genes more. “Doesn’t he look like me?” I ask with excitement to all my family and friends. And to the one who does not agree, I only have to show them my baby pic. Dare I say, he has my genes and they “suit” him better .
- Patience – the word gets added to my dictionary– Patience never came easily to me. I’ve always wanted things to be fast paced and my way; it was my weakness. But as a mom our limits are pushed on plenty of occasions. Sometimes it drives you crazy, makes you go nuts! But now, every day my lil’ one is teaching me patience. We learn to understand and calm ourselves for this new life we brought into the world. And for the days when one just can’t and it gets overwhelming, then just take a pillow press your face against it and just scream! (I read it somewhere, it works) They say “this is just the beginning , wait till he start walking !!! “
- Dirty House , I can take that. In these few weeks I have learned things cannot always be perfect. Some days, it is okay if the diapers are everywhere in the living room or your stuff is spread out on the dining table, and that the laundry is still lying in the washer after its cycle . It is all about getting that one hour and boom! “Its SHINY” (The strength of Multitasking)
- Life is like a talent hunt show – From feeding, to bathing to just making Vir sleep, I sing or hum numerous times of the day. Dancing and making animated faces, talking like a baby or making funny sounds are also a part of my daily acts that I break into to calm him. I have started enjoying this as I am rewarded back with his smiles and coos. I will continue to do this no matter how foolish I look, so I guess vanity also goes out of the door.
- Yoga pants a wardrobe essential: Our bodies change a lot and seriously when you don’t fit in anything and feel all crappy or more like a morbidly obese penguin, Yoga pants or stretch leggings come to the rescue. The only pieces of clothing which I could fit in from my pregnancy to my postpartum stage comfortably. They have been supporting me for so long that today they are my best friends (literally). The stretch fabric and elastic waistbands holds everything together and gives you a sense of tightness. I am so glad that these are more acceptable form of dressing to coffee shops and grocery stores. You can make your own personal style statement with it and stay snazzy. I have been buying more of these lately.